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Elliott

from JOYMAYKR by The Grievance Club

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lyrics

"Ask and you'll receive,"
When you all but state the need.
What am i before the product of my lowest qualities?

I said I'd be your sponge, now we're both torn up and soaked
I thought that you could use me and I choked.

You choked on your words
on their way out of your mouth
Your most concise conceptions couldn't stomach all the doubt.
You're caught in the middle
It felt uncomfortable
to see real shame
Deep-seated,
Tangible

So I look down.
The stones weaken the whiskey in my glass.
The minutes pass.

When you look at me, what do you see
except the sum of parts of my closest company?

Passion is such a pretty plan to stare at thoughtfully
Dreams of ambition; intangibly plenty.
Deficient.
"Right where I need to be"
is nothing that's ever occurred to me.
I suspect you feel the same.
Spend your days reconstructing models of yourself:
Improve romantically

"You'll sort it all out,"
but who's the reassurance for?
I want to be supportive and I don't think I know how anymore.

You were centered in the entropy,
I was contemplating legacies
straight-edging boxes/screaming obscenities
Dancing through the weeds in online echo assemblies
And we both end up where they smile at our names
Wax romantic at the bar,
exist passively
Talking through the day's defeats and whether there's a way
to love and to fuck
without inducing pain

I thought that I could shoulder the doubt that left you soaked
I thought that you could use me, and I choked
I thought that I could help you, now we're both just more alone
I thought that you could use me and I...

credits

from JOYMAYKR, released February 25, 2022

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